You cannot stay the way you are and go with God.

Oh, how I try.

My mask last night was totally different than the one at CIY.

What does that mean?

Did I leave that person in Carbondale? Did I simply exchange who I took to Carbondale for a new & improved version of me? Because “Youth Minister” is, frankly, not much better than the duality of man thing I had going on earlier. Youth Minister sucks, because with him around, i need to have the perfect family, good kids, great and available wife, Bible studies always done, knowing all the answers, no problems, no sin struggles, just on top of it all. Youth Minister is a great mask though, it allows me to come to work, do (and lead!) Bible studies without purpose, and, as long as the kids show up at the appointed time, and feign interest and growth, I get paid for this!

The ones that fall behind, that trade their faith for a false religion (or no religion, for that matter), wow. What to do with them? Youth Minister has an answer for them too, just love them and be in prayer for them. Maybe if I can just talk some sense into them, they’ll convert. Have a dynamic youth program where the Bible alone is taught, and they’ll come running.

I hate Youth Minister. He is a phony, a fraud, and I see right through him. The only problem is…I’m not sure who I see.

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